Sisters in Crime

They look harmless enough....

...until they decide to do the laundry for you.

(yep, they carried this lil tikes table in here all by themselves : )

This would be detergent in the fabric softener opening

and unmeasurable amounts of detergent in with the laundry.

Playing in the living room seems harmless enough too until you see there are no toys out in sight and only a step ladder by the suddenly bare Christmas tree...

...oh, and this pile of ornaments on the footstool.

Nothing like getting to decorate the tree twice for one Christmas!!

Gift Ideas to help ORPHANS!

Show the love of Christ to a child in need this Christmas!

What are you doing this year for Christmas?

Decorating the house? Making Christmas cookies? Celebrating with family and loved ones? Exchanging gifts?

What if this year you gave gifts that not only celebrated your loved ones but brought the love of Christ to a child in need? An orphan in Africa, India, Ukraine, or Honduras?

This year Lifesong for Orphans has gifts that will do just that. Give the new Lifesong cookbook...

or give a child in Africa food, a child in Honduras job skills training, a child in India a home... in honor of those you love... and really, what could be better at Christmas than to know your gift was given to a child who needed it more.

Check it out here.

May God bless your holiday season!


10-11 Gifts of Purpose from Lifesong for Orphans on Vimeo.

Pain that brings THANKSGIVING

Only God would equate pain with thanksgiving.

I would never write this post if I did not believe it was true nor would I know how to write this if I had not experienced it. The last 6 mos. have turned everything upside down around my little family of David, me and our kids. We are fine... but so many loved ones near us are not. Family and friends alike, on both sides. But, because we bear one another's burdens... in reality, we are not fine.

Each situation unique, each with grievous pain. Some pain is emotional, some physical and some spiritual. So many times, everything in me has cried out to God... "make it all STOP!" So many times, I just plead with God to send Christ back so we can go home. Of course, there are too many that do not know Him as Savior to really wish that.

Probably the deepest hurt for me is to see willful choices of sin that lead to devastation... for everyone, not just themselves. Consequences for those who "do what is right in their own eyes" hold tragedy of all kinds and sadly even for the surrounding innocent. The Enemy is cunning and disguises himself as an angel of light, justifying every fleshly desire.

Recently, it has occurred to me, that actually ALL pain is a result of willful choices of sin. The earth itself and all of mankind has been cursed because of sin. You can't read or watch the news without recognizing our world is devastated.

How does any of this lead to thanksgiving? I'm glad you asked.

"More than that, I count all things to be loss in view of the surpassing value of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whom I have suffered the loss of all things, and count them but rubbish so that I may gain Christ, and may be found in Him, not having a righteousness of my own derived from the Law, but that which is faith in Christ, the righteousness which comes from God on the basis of faith, that I may know Him and the power of His resurrection and the fellowship of His sufferings, being conformed to His death; in order that I may attain to the resurrection from the dead." Philippians 3:8-11

"Beloved, do not be surprised at the fiery ordeal among you, which comes upon you for your testing, as though some strange thing were happening to you; but to the degree that you share the sufferings of Christ, keep on rejoicing, so that also at the revelation of His glory you may rejoice with exultation. If you are reviled for the name of Christ, you are blessed, because the Spirit of glory and of God rests on you." 1 Peter 4:12-14

And then, yesterday, as I was working on my Isaiah study, God lovingly revived my weary heart with these precious words of truth that left tears of joy streaming down my face...

"He(God) will swallow up death for all time, And the Lord GOD will wipe tears away from all faces, And He will remove the reproach of His people from all the earth; For the LORD has spoken. And it will be said in that day, 'Behold, this is our God for whom we have waited that He might save us. This is the LORD for whom we have waited; Let us rejoice and be glad in His salvation.'"

Be encouraged dear sisters and brothers... "THIS is our GOD for whom we have waited that He might SAVE us!" Our time here is short and so many are lost. Don't be surprised by the abundant hardships but rest in His abundant comfort. Press on with me, friends! Don't lose sight of the goal when we are so close! Our GOD will be faithful to do it!! Choose today to give thanks for the great things He has done and REJOICE in the sufferings of Christ!

And let us not forget to pray for one another....

Adventures in Picture Taking

It's been a while since the girls got their pictures taken... so decided to get Sarah's 3 yr. and Emily's 2.5yr. yesterday!

Sarah did GREAT...

pulling out all the stops on big smiles

She had the photographers melting with their awwww's and she's so cute comments : )

And then there was Emily....

This one is my all time favorite...

the photographer PERFECTLY captured her 2 year old tantrum so I'll be able to remember them forever : )

Somehow...(through much bribing and distractions) we were able to turn Emily around

She even giggled a little!

I was grateful they caught her famous mischievous smile... she definitely has the DNA of our boys!

And finally a sweet one to finish off the day : )

Now just have to get a pic of all the kids for Christmas... or maybe not, ha ha!!

I love my Jesus

Earlier today, my little Guatemalan princess walks in to the kitchen while I was making dinner. My once shy and timid daughter, who now exhibits confidence in her 2 yr. old strut, makes her way towards me. Tickled by her cuteness, I swoop her up and squeeze her close to me as I say,"I love my Sarah". And just as natural as could be, she turned in my cradle hold, looked straight into my eyes and said, " I love my Jesus".

It's true, I can be dramatic. But there was something about that moment that will stand the test of time for me. My soul filled up with more thoughts than I could possibly write. But there was one main thread in all of it.... "remember". It was like God was saying...

Remember, Marianne, how I spoke to you in Jamaica?

Remember that I told you that you had found ME in the orphan?

Remember how I showed you that I was making a way for you to bring Sarah into your home with the miscarriage of your baby?
Remember that I provided EVERY penny needed for Sarah's adoption?
Remember how I brought Sarah home at just the right time and in just the right way?
Remember that I showed you that I loved you first so that you could love Me back?
Remember that you physically adopted Sarah so that I can teach her about eternal adoption?
Remember....

Funny how God seems to weave messages into your life that no one else gets except for you. Yes, we serve that personal of a God. "Remembering" is something that God has talked to me about many times in my life... specifically in times of doubt, pain or persecution. The trials facing my family seem more gigantic to me than Goliath. Contending for our faith requires endurance and this trial has felt like a marathon although it has only been 4 months. It is in these times that I recognize the Lord's prompting to remember.

Many times I choose to "remember" by looking at how God has brought me through personally in hard times before. Greater still, I "remember" by looking at how God has brought His people through hard times in the Word. But for some reason, these thoughts have felt over used or have lost it's power in my determination to hold on to faith and hope as of late.

However, a stirring in my heart has occurred the last few days and was solidified in my daughter's words today, "I love my Jesus". Remembering Jesus. Remembering the cross. Remembering there is no other hope but in the name of Jesus Christ. That no matter what befalls us in this life, Jesus is enough. Remembering that it was MY sin that put Him on the cross. Remembering that it was His choice to stay there for me. Remembering that even more than anything He's done IN my life, He's who GAVE me life. Remembering that there is no greater miracle and no greater act of love than what He has already done! Oh, ye of little faith. Is anything too impossible for Him? Never.

Chapter 9 of Nehemiah could have a chapter heading of "remembering". There are two separate kinds of remembering accounted for... God remembering and Israel NOT remembering.

The essence of the chapter is the descendants of Israel separating themselves from the people, recommitting to the Law of Moses and turning towards God. They even put an agreement in writing in a sealed document with the names of their leaders, the Levites and the priests.

In the midst of their fasting and reading from the Law, the Levites cry out to the Lord in confession and remembrance. They declare and remember WHO God is and WHAT God has done. In doing so, there is a great contrast.

God was faithful. Israel was not.

God was forgiving, gracious, compassionate, slow to anger and abounding in lovingkindness. Israel was disobedient, rebellious, stubborn, arrogant and blasphemous.

God did not forsake. Israel turned away.

God spoke. Israel didn't listen.

You see, God REMEMBERS His promises and He keeps them. Israel FORGOT to remember the "wondrous deeds which [God] had performed among them"(v.17). And since we have a God that never changes, we know He remembers His promise to the children of God... we are His, we are adopted into the family of God through the blood of Jesus forever.

Have you forgotten to remember what God has done for you? If He hasn't done anything else for you.... the cross is more than any of us will ever deserve. And that's enough. In a world that screams "entitlement" from every angle, let's remember.... our sin, our unfaithfulness, our arrogance, our pride, our forgetfulness. And humbly remember the GRACIOUS and COMPASSIONATE gift of Jesus. Oh Lord, have mercy on this servant.

I LOVE MY JESUS!

I am going to end our study of Nehemiah with Chapter 9 with the above post. Please read the remaining chapters and enjoy! But since I begin my fall Bible study with Isaiah this week, I need to close this online study out.

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True Understanding=True Rejoicing

Chapter 7:

We won't spend a lot of time on this chapter but there are a couple of observations that need attention. The backdrop to this chapter is, of course, the completion of the wall.

1. First you see Nehemiah continue in stellar leadership. He does not finish the wall, pat himself on the back and put his feet up. Instead, you see him taking seriously the responsibility of protecting the people. He appoints people for leadership based not on worldly wisdom but on the premise of faithfulness and fear of God.

*What a great lesson to remind us to not be tempted to assign leadership roles based foremost on ability, rather, the faithfulness and fear of God in an individual.

2. Secondly, you see Nehemiah obediently respond to God's prompting by assembling the people to be enrolled in genealogies. I think it's easy to become bored with names of people when we don't know who they are, particularly names that are nearly impossible to pronounce, ha ha. However, maybe we shouldn't focus on the individual names as much as the significance of all of them together represent. You see, these names are the individuals and families that would carry on the heritage of Abraham and make possible the furtherance of the lineage of Christ. The names of these exiled people were chosen to bring forth the Name above all Names through their return to Jerusalem.

*Have you ever visited the Vietnam War Memorial? I have not. But I have heard what a moving experience it is to see list after list of names of those who sacrificed for our country's freedom. How much more moving, then, is it to see a list of names of those who represent the carrying on of a promise that would bring ultimate freedom to the world, for all who believe.

Chapter 8:

I am still trying to wrap my brain around this text. There is a LOT to absorb here. We've talked so far in our study together about tools of observation.... repeated words/phrases, location and context. Well, here's another one to notice... TIME : ) Repetition, location, context and time are ALL important in this chapter.

*Observation 1 : The scene of this chapter opens up at the Water Gate(remember reading about this in the building of the wall?). It's very interesting that this Gate is the chosen place for the reading of the Word. "Water" is very symbolic in the Bible. It often represents a "washing" of your spirit through the Word of God.... the Word cleanses and washes our souls.

*Observation 2: A specific word that is repeated several times is "understanding". Reading and hearing the Word of God requires understanding. Matthew 13:14-15 says,

"You will keep on hearing, but will not understand; you will keep on seeing, but will not perceive; For the heart of this people has become dull, with their ears they scarcely hear, and they have closed their eyes, Otherwise they would see with their eyes, hear with their ears, and UNDERSTAND with their heart and return, And I would heal them."

The people listening to Ezra read the Word of the Lord heard with their hearts... they understood.

*Observation 3: Did you all notice the timing of this chapter? It was a feast... the feast of trumpets. We know that because the text says it was the first day of the 7th month. It was to be a week of rejoicing. But in verse 9, we are told that the people were weeping. Why? After hearing the Word of God with UNDERSTANDING, there was conviction and repentance. The great news is that with repentance and turning towards God, there is healing. Now that's cause for celebration! Nehemiah reminded them that they were to rejoice in the midst of their godly sorrow. And in their understanding they did just that... they ate, drank and celebrated!

All 3 of these observations could have so many applications for all of us. In light of the trials facing my family, these bring heavy TRUTHS. We absolutely MUST know the Word of God. Understanding MUST accompany reading and hearing the Word of God. Matthew 13:19 says,

"When anyone hears the word of the kingdom and does not understand it, the evil one comes and snatches away what has been sown in his heart. This is the one on whom seed was sown beside the road."

There are many believers today that would rather be spoon fed by sermons, inspirational worship music and passionate literature(books that have not been "inspired" such as the Bible but because they are about God or the Bible, they are considered "Bible studies") than dig in and be cleansed by the washing of the Word of God. My question for those who feel that I've stepped on their toes is this, "Do you have understanding?" and "Are you ready in season and out of season to answer?" If your answer is "no", you have put yourself in a dangerous position. False teaching is rampant today. The devil does not play fair and probably knows Scripture better than you. Do not be tossed about by every wind of doctrine but stand firm on the rock of your salvation.

With true understanding, there is conviction which leads to repentance. Repentance is a turning away from sin and a turning TOWARDS God. The Word of God is powerful and has the ability to divide soul and spirit. Being washed with the Word continuously is necessary for believers. Having this understanding, there is JOY in the healing only the LORD of LORDS can bring. It is this JOY to which Nehemiah refers in verse 10.."for this day is holy to our Lord. Do not be grieved, for the joy of the LORD is your strength."

No matter your trial today, friend, no matter your sin... He is mighty to save! Allow His Word to cleanse you and wash you, read with understanding and REJOICE for HE is our STRENGTH!

Summer pics and Nehemiah 4-6

Finally redeemed the pastor appreciation gift from our church for a family Cardinal's game!

The "pack-pack" girls...

not sure if we could go anywhere without our pack-packs.

Went on a short mini-vacay to St. Louis... the girls and me at the City Museum!

It was sooo cool.. the tunnels+artwork=awesome!

Kids with Daddy waiting for the water to splash in the cave!

I think the boys could have climbed through these metal tunnels for hours...

not me, my knees are stilling saying "ouch"!

We couldn't get over how fearless our girls were!

Dave and the treasure he found... a fire hydrant that claims his favorite state.

Anyone else have a two yr. old that adamantly says,

"I do it!" with EVERYTHING?? Good thing she's cute!

Our only family pic... at the Arch

It was a looong day of walking... everyone's feet were giving out.

So glad our big boy is growing up and can help carry the load!

(Dave had Sarah on his shoulders : )

Monkey see as monkey do : )

Always love the zoo!

Zach crossing home plate!

Caleb taking his stance on the pitcher's mound.

Nehemiah 4-6:

Thanks for not giving up on me... as you can see from the pics, we've had an event filled summer. It hasn't kept me from His Word but the blog certainly took a back burner for a while : )

Chapter 4- This chapter dealt with one major theme FEAR! Have you ever been afraid? I know I have! I've feared physical events, emotional and physical pain, and constantly battle the fear of the unknown. Fear is a tactic of the enemy and is especially effective with believers. Why? It paralyzes and is contagious. Check out any statements made by Adolf Hitler on his "weapons of war" and fear was one his best tools.

In this chapter, the enemy conspired together to wage war against the Jews as they set out to rebuild. When Nehemiah saw the fear rise up in his people, he reminded them who God is and not to fear. He told them to "fight". In verse 17, we are told the workers did their work with one hand and held their weapon with the other. They had a trumpet sound to rally for battle... knowing "Our God will fight for us."

In the current trial my family is enduring, fear has been a major component. It has sought to destroy and paralyze those of us doing our best to "build the wall", if you will. But when fear comes knocking, we are quickly learning to REMEMBER who the Lord is... how great and awesome is HE and to not be afraid. With one hand we build for God's glory and with the other we wield the sword of TRUTH, ready to confront the enemy. And when the enemy comes, we sound the trumpet to all the believers fighting this battle with us and PRAY for we know that "Our God will fight for us."

Chapter 5- I got a little help from my friend, Wiersbe, on this chapter. The first 5 verses require knowledge about Jewish customs and laws to understand the whole gravity of what was going on. Wiersbe entitle this section "selfishness". Basically Jews were cheating Jews and even forcing bondage on some. All for the almighty dollar... well, probably not the "dollar", but you know what I mean : ) Wiersbe makes an interesting point that when Satan fails at one attempt, he often tries to destroy internally.... through our own selfishness. Think about that for a minute... makes sense doesn't it??

When we are seeking to " build a wall" or God's kingdom , we must remember Christ humbly became the ultimate servant, taking the form of a bond-servant and we are to follow that example!

Chapter 6- Ok, so I finally decided, yep, this one's my favorite! Probably because of the HOPE we find in verse 16.

The chapter opens up with an attempt to lure Nehemiah to a"meeting", so that the enemy could trap him. Then another attempt was made to stop the work by spreading lies and an accusation that Nehemiah was a rebel. When that did not work, a traitor was sent to persuade Nehemiah to hide in the temple so that they could kill him.

And did Nehemiah falter, hesitate or submit to the threats and tauntings of the enemy?? Nope. He was steadfast. He recognized every attempt made by his adversary.

In fact the wall was completed IN THE MIDST of these "trials". It was finished in a mere 52 days. As a result of their enemies HEARING and SEEING it .... they lost their confidence. For they recognized the work had been accomplished with the help of God!

How can we apply this chapter to our lives?

1. We can be alert and aware of the schemes of Satan... there are a LOT of verses about this one. Why don't you spend a little time today looking some up? The best way of spotting a lie is to KNOW the Truth!

2. When we are faced with lies, we don't believe them. Be steadfast and stand firm in your faith!!

3. Never underestimate God's work in the midst of trials... remember, His ways are not our ways.

4. When GOD does something, even the enemy recognizes it! May we be people who do things WITH God's strength and FOR God's glory so that ALL may see HOPE of Christ!

Much love to you today and may His joy be your strength!

Big God for a Big Job

I hate to admit it but I am easily overwhelmed by the "big picture" when there is a big job to be done. Recently, I was gone for a few days to go to a conference and upon return, I unexpectedly had to leave again for 3 more days. And oh man, when I get out of routine, things pile up fast. Needless to say, it's taken over a month for this house to return to order : )

Can you even imagine for a moment the BIG job that awaited Nehemiah and the Israelites? Sure there were a lot of people willing to do the work but where to start?? And who does what?? I organize a local conference for orphan care/adoption every year and work with a team of about 5 or 6 people. My head sometimes swims with all the details and oversight to make sure each thing gets done in the time it needs to. But, I cannot even begin to wrap my mind around the organization needed to oversee 42 different groups of people. I mean how crazy is that??

There were 3 things that stood out to me in Chapter 3: the people, the repairs and the process.

The people

Like I said before, there were a LOT of people. There are 42 different groups of people recorded along with many individuals and anonymous people. Notice how they were all kinds of people too... nobles, officials, priests, governors, lay people, townspeople, sons and daughters. Warren Wiersbe points out in Be Determined, how this reflects what Paul said in 1 Cor. 12&14 about the many members of the Body that make up the Church. It takes all kinds to do the work of the Lord... and each person has their place.

The repairs

If I've learned anything about studying the Bible, it's that you always pay attention to repeated words. Well, it's pretty hard to miss that "repairs" is a repeated word : ) The word means to make strong and firm. They weren't trying to accomplish some shoddy work... they were building to last. It's also interesting to note that though the walls were torn down... something still existed in the form of the wall in order to be rebuilt.

The process

This was the most fun part for me to study. Another tool in studying the Bible is to always pay attention to locations. If you are unfamiliar with the layout of the city of Jerusalem, it would be easy to skim over the many gates and towers during this chapter. You have to be willing to dig to uncover jewels : ) Luckily for me, I have a map of the walls and gates of Jerusalem in my Bible. So, as I read through this chapter I located each gate on the map. It was very rewarding to take this extra time to discover that there was a specific order to repairing the wall. They started at the north end of the city and went counter-clockwise in a circle until they came back to the Sheep Gate again. Isn't it just like our God to be so orderly? I also was blessed to read commentaries on the significance of the names of each gate in light of the order in which they were repaired... I'd encourage you to investigate this for yourself!

Chapter 3 was very powerful for me in light of a recent family crisis. When facing insurmountable tasks, obstacles and trials as an individual, family or church.... what can we learn from this chapter?

*I think we can learn that God will use many, many people... great and small. He will use many different kinds of people to be the fulfillment of the Body of Christ. After all, it is for HIS glory that we do all things.

*I think we can learn that God will rebuild the sacred things of God, whether it be His people, relationships or ministries, to make them strong and firm... He won't use some "quick fix". His ways are not our ways... and most definitely not America's "instant gratification" ways. His ways are also not the newest fad or creative idea but rather, His ways are timeless and never changing... ahh, the importance of knowing our God through the WHOLE Word of God and not selective passages.

*I think we can learn that God will use a process that is orderly, significant and meaningful. We should never want to rearrange the process/order of things God has designed. If we remember that "all things work together for good for those who are in Christ Jesus", we can know that every part of whatever process we go through in life is necessary and for our own good and more importantly, for the good of the Kingdom of God. (Obviously, I am not talking about willfully choosing to sin here.)

I pray God is encouraging you as much as He is me in this study! Can't wait to get to chapter 4 next... it's a toss up between 4 and 6 of which one is my favorite so far : ) Thanks to all who have commented and or let me know they are joining me on this journey with Nehemiah... I really enjoy hearing what God is saying to each of you personally and how much is blesses me too!

Do we have the confidence to succeed?

Well.. I hope you haven't lost interest in our friend, Nehemiah, since I've taken soooo long to post again. But I know you won't be disappointed in the truths you will be SURE to discover about our awesome God in this precious book!

We left off the story with Nehemiah requesting permission from the king of Persia to go back home and rebuild his homeland... the city of David. Our text today is Chapter 2:9-20. Nehemiah arrives in Jerusalem despite the displeasure of several officials in the land. He inspects the destruction by night so the officials and Jews would not know what he was doing. Then he makes his announcement.

Nehemiah gives his testimony, in a sense, of how God has been working in his life up to that moment. He invites others to join in what God is doing. Their response... Let's do it!!

What do we learn here...

I think it's interesting to note the process that Nehemiah goes about gaining the support of his people. First, he investigates the situation thoroughly and therefore able to speak knowledgeably as to what he is proposing. Secondly, he speaks to the people with the plan and backs it up with God's favor and the king's favor. Nehemiah speaks with confidence because it is God's WILL(ch. 2:12) to rebuild the wall and city!!!

One application could be...

... when God speaks to you to "do" something.... 1. educate yourself and investigate 2. be sure you KNOW it's God's will and can speak confidently being able to back up what you're doing with Scripture. Do we have the confidence to succeed? It must be the RIGHT confidence. I love the last verse of Ch. 2...

"So I answered them and said to them, "The God of heaven will give us success; therefore we His servants will arise and build, but you(the enemy) have no portion, right or memorial in Jerusalem."

We don't have anything to fear when we are following God's will... HE will give success... just as in fact He has already succeeded!!

I would love to keep going on to chapters 3 and 4... I am anxious to share the beauty of these next scriptures but I will leave you today with this and pray to meet with you again in a few days for those next treasures!

Zachary Lost His 3rd Tooth!

Zachary lost his 3rd tooth on the last day of school today! He's been patiently waiting and today was the big day. He lost it by bonking into Emily and then he thought something was in his mouth and he reached in and it was his tooth! The place he lost it was at McDonald's.

Do we even care?

Have you ever received words that literally dropped you to your knees? I mean the kind of news that sends your heart and mind into a tailspin? How did you respond? Did you run to a friend, shake your fists in the air, pull the covers over your head and not want to face life? Or have you faced such despair that darkness prevails and depression swallows your life?

Our friend, Nehemiah, faced such a time as this. Nehemiah was a cupbearer for the King of Persia, a generation after the famous story of Queen Esther. Cupbearer was a secure and prominent position that could lend itself to having great influence, bad or good. However, the Lord had plans that would change Nehemiah's comfortable life. Just one simple conversation.

Friends of Nehemiah came from Judah and he asked them how things were for the Jews who survived the captivity and about Jerusalem. Upon hearing the words of great distress, reproach and the desolation of the city, Nehemiah sat and wept. He wept and he mourned for DAYS. He fasted and prayed.

Is there anything in your life that is in ruins? Is there distress? Reproach? How about someone else's life? How about your neighbor that is lost spiritually? Do you care? Do you sit down and weep? Do you fast and pray over their distress? Tough questions, I know. And I must confess, that God has convicted me of what caring really looks like. Could there be more than an "I'll be praying for you" here and a "bless your heart" there? How often do we sit and weep over sacred things, like, broken marriages, lost souls, orphaned children, and prodigal sons/daughters in the lives of others.... until it's us.

Nehemiah prays a beautiful prayer reminding God who He is and the covenant He has promised. He confesses the sins of His people and begs God to hear his prayer.

According to the timeline of the Hebrew months, about 4 mos. pass by after Nehemiah prays. The King notices that Nehemiah is sad. Nehemiah is rightfully afraid as it was expected for those in the King's presence to enjoy the King's company. But God is with Nehemiah. Nehemiah boldly asks detailed permission to go to his homeland that is in ruins so that he could rebuild it.

A couple things stand out to me in these 8 verses. One is that Nehemiah waited on God. He did not force a plan in his timing for how to "fix the problem" the remnant faced and the condition of Jerusalem. It was after 4 mos. that the King noticed Nehemiah's sadness. The text says Nehemiah declares he was never sad in his presence. My conclusion is that it must have been God that made the King aware, thus it was God's timing. Another good example by Nehemiah... waiting on God to hear our cries.

The second observation is that Nehemiah cared enough to say something when the appointed time came. He cared enough for his people and his city to ask a question that put Nehemiah in danger. Nehemiah was afraid but he asked anyway. He prayed to the Lord and the good hand of God came on him. He asked to return and rebuild the city of his people.

Most of us are not typically in a place where caring about someone or doing the Lord's will would put us in physical danger. But many of us face fears of another sort... pride, security, loss. Do we care enough to overcome fear? Do we care enough to seize the moment that God brings about and obey?

Nehemiah cared. He cared enough to weep, mourn, pray, speak up and enough to go. Yep, the next section of chapter 2 is Nehemiah GOING!

Wow... I think I'll be able to chew on these truths in the Word for a few days. If you haven't read these first sections of Nehemiah yet, think about ... the situation, how Nehemiah related to God, and what was Nehemiah's example? And if you want to go deeper, check out Precepts Bible study methods and some commentaries(like Wiersbe)... that's what I used as I studied : ) I have to conclude with a poignant excerpt from Wiersbe's commentary on Nehemiah...

God is still looking for people who care, people like Nehemiah, who cared enough to ask for the facts, weep over the needs, pray for God’s help, and then volunteer to get the job done.

“Here am I, Lord—send me!”

Thanks for reading with me. I love the accountability and I would love to hear any insights God shares with you too!

Joy amidst the ruins

I recently have been drawn to the book of Nehemiah. A favorite verse and known by so many has been echoing in my heart..."for the joy of the LORD is your strength"(Neh. 8:10). This verse has taken on new meaning in my life recently and I look forward to some in-depth study and insights that the Spirit will be sure to reveal(because I have a God that promises if you seek Him, you will indeed find Him).

First observations of this verse are that God holds true to His character. The people of Israel are not told that the joy of the Lord is their strength during a time of great happiness and prosperity but rather a time of great grief and sorrow. This intrigues me....

Would you be willing to study Nehemiah with me over the next few weeks and together let's see what the Lord would have His children learn? I hope you do and I look forward to posting Truths that He teaches me over the next few weeks. May the joy of the Lord be your strength!!

Life with mi Princesa

I realize it has been some time now since I have updated on how we are "doing" since Sarah has come home. The last time I posted, we were experiencing some set-backs, mostly with sleeping. You can read about that here. Through that time period, I came to understand how significant bonding and attachment are to a successful adoption.

Before I update how things are going, I want to preface our personal experience, advice and results with the reminder that every child and every family is different... there is absolutely no black and white formula in adoption! Just as everyone who adopts has their own unique experience and challenges, we also have had a rare experience with it's own difficulties. We brought home an almost 1 yr. old right after bringing home a newborn, 4.5 months earlier. In essence, we faced the new and stretching experience of "twins" at the same time as the new and stretching experience of adoption. Certainly God-ordained but completely unfamiliar territory for me.

I have a few friends with twins and many friends who have adopted, but no friends that have had both at the same time. I'm pretty sure I'm not the only one that feels "alone" when there is no one around facing the same circumstances as you. Remember that is ONLY a feeling though! God will never leave us nor forsake us!

Because of our interesting situation, there is something that has to be mentioned. Bonding and attachment is readily talked about from the child's perspective but rarely talked about from the parent's perspective. In our situation, I struggled with bonding to Sarah on some level. I didn't recognize it at first because I thought our "disconnect" was coming from Sarah not bonding to me. And there is truth to that, but I guess it's kind of like trying to figure out if the chicken came before the egg.

I struggled because.... when I would walk into the room, Emily would smile and squeal and Sarah would just look at me. I struggled because I couldn't seem to comfort Sarah the same way as my other kids. I struggled because there were fewer "mommy" moments than "caretaker" moments in our relationship. It's funny, it seems men are usually the ones that struggle with these thoughts before deciding to adopt, but I wouldn't be surprised if it's the mommies that struggle the most in post-adoption.

Well, before anyone might get discouraged about adopting.... let me say, Sarah and I are doing GREAT!! There are 2 reasons why.

Reason 1:

Remember, in my post last fall, that I felt God telling me that He was going to heal Sarah's hurting, insecure heart through me? Well, God continued to teach me in this. Part of why I struggled was the little differences I noticed in how Sarah responded to me versus the other kids. A few months ago God impressed on me 1 John 4:19, "We love, because He first loved us." Wow! Do you see that? When God adopted us, He loved us FIRST and THEN we were able to love Him back. Is that not the same in earthly adoptions? The Truth really does always set you free : )

Reason 2:

We received a book from Lifesong for Orphans, after our adoption, called The Connected Child by Dr. Purvis. It is WONDERFUL! I highly recommend it. Here are three things we got from this book that have helped tremendously in perspective and pro-activity:

1. Time- Relationships take time. Don't expect too much too soon. Every time table is different. Patience, patience, patience and then some more.

2. Intentionality- It's no surprise that the newborn stage is vital to learning to trust and bonding. When that stage is missed, Dr. Purvis suggests recreating some of those important aspects of infancy, like, long periods of eye contact, skin on skin touching and one on one interacting. This was incredibly good for me in connecting with Sarah... loved it!!

3. Discipline- The first year Sarah was home I disciplined her the same way I did Emily. By the end of that first year, every time I disciplined, she was worse. We were doing a lot of "time-outs". Dr. Purvis says that "time-outs" can reinforce feeling separated, disconnected or unloved. Instead, we've tried her recommended "time-ins" the last few months. It's been a great success. We don't take Sarah to her room anymore when she misbehaves but now we sit her against a wall in close proximity to us where she is not isolated. I can't begin to tell you how much better this has worked for us!

All in All, I am madly in love with mi Princesa, Sarah! She is sweet, funny, kind, mild-natured, shy, and absolutely delightful! Sarah and I share so many intimate moments that are full of sheer joy! I am so thankful for the beauty God has created in our mother/daughter bond. God is so good and so faithful. He never ceases to teach me about His unfathomable grace! What privilege it is to experience the "shadow" of our spiritual adoption on this earth with my precious daughter from the heart.

Oh, and by the way, now BOTH my girls smile and squeal when I walk into the room... just ask the church nursery workers!!!

Home

This past week has reminded me in so many ways of where "home" is and where it is not. Difficult situations, difficult relationships, saying goodbye to loved ones and losing heart over the loss of a dream.... all of these point to sin in this world in some form or other. In this world, there is so much that we fear, cling to, and desire in an attempt to satisfy, fulfill, or bring security. I'm sure if in our human minds we could truly grasp the brevity of life, we would not struggle. I've heard it said if we understood how short our lives were, we would live differently. I believe that, but not in the way most might think. I wouldn't necessarily do different things or say different things because "understanding" alone cannot take away my humanity. No, I believe it would result in less conflict between my spirit and my flesh.

To understand the reality of an 85 year life-span in light of eternity has to change anyone's perspective. I remember when I was facing giving birth for the 1st time and the terror I felt thinking about it. I would comfort myself with the thought... "it's ONE day, just one day. I can do anything for one day!"(yes, I understand some of you faced longer labor than 24hrs. but hang with me here, just using an average). I can't help but think our lives, defined in the Bible as a "vapor", could be compared to giving birth. In fact, I did not come up with anything new, the Bible describes waiting for the day of the Lord as labor pains.

There are so many people near and dear to me facing extreme trials testing their faith, endurance, and hope in Christ. My heart aches for them. Their suffering is real and it is awful and it can only be blamed by a fallen world. I pray for faith that "understands" in a godly way our "light and momentary" troubles. I pray for those suffering to have that faith too. That we would all hold one another up and march through this life with the joy set before us, awaiting the redemption of Christ in ALL it's fullness. Even creation groans for this coming day.

As always, the Lord teaches my innermost being in times of vulnerability and times of helplessness watching loved ones hurt. Amidst a study I'm doing on the last kings of Judah, I found myself in Romans 8. A favorite chapter for me personally on being adopted by the Father. The passage right after "receiving a spirit of adoption" kindled my heart. It is so good, I must share it with you.

"For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory that is to be revealed to us. For the anxious longing of creation waits eagerly for the revealing of the sons of God. For the creation was subjected to futility, not willingly, but because of Him who subjected it, in hope that the creation itself also will be set free from its slavery to corruption into the freedom of the glory of the children of God. For we know that the whole creation groans and suffers the pains of childbirth together until now. And not only this, but also we ourselves, having the first fruits of the Spirit, even we ourselves groan within ourselves, waiting eagerly for our adoption as sons, the redemption of our body. For in hope we have been saved, but hope that is seen is not hope; for who hopes for what he already sees? But if we hope for what we do not see, with perseverance we wait eagerly for it.

May we fear, cling to, and desire God Almighty instead of the temporal and lies this world offers. I don't know about you but I can't wait for the day when we all are finally HOME... forever!

Happy Birthday lil' Sunshine!!!

Emily turned TWO today! She's gotten so big so fast...

We'll have a "Melmo" (Elmo) party with the family in a few days but opened a few presents this morning : ) The boys were more excited about her birthday than I think they are about their own... they crack me up! Zachary spent HOURS drawing pictures of Emily's favorite things and making her a picture book and Caleb wrapped almost all of Emily's presents. They both made precious cards for their littlest sister that I thought I'd share.... enjoy :)

( I like my sister because she is crazy and she plays games.)

( Dear Emily, Everybody just loves you so much! I can't believe you are already turning 2 years old! You are going to love all your presents! And also you are almost in preschool already! Love, Caleb )