Still asking that question... 9 mos. later : )
One of the biggest blessings of these unnatural "twins" is
I just recently noticed that I always put Sarah on the left and Emily on the right whether it's the high chairs, carseats or cribs... crazy but I'm told by mommies of "twins" this is normal.
"Often times we take for granted special things or special moments because they are familiar and natural. For instance, the way I've always held my babies to comfort them. We're talking hours and hours over the last 8 yrs. spent standing and bouncing with my babies cradled inward, tummy to tummy, their tiny heads resting in the crook of my arm against my chest and their legs straddling my other arm.
When Sarah came home, she didn't want to be cradled, it made her scream. She only allowed us to hold her up on our shoulders or sitting in our laps facing outward. A few months home, she allowed me to sit with her on my lap and rock her.... it was like heaven!
Today, Sarah woke too early from her nap and I thought, "oh, if only I could get her back to sleep!" Without really processing what I was doing, I took her in my arms and cradled her just like my other three and started gently bouncing. She just looked up at me so peacefully and her eyes slowly closed. There was no screaming, no fighting... just a daughter resting in her mother's arms.
The strange part is I don't remember ever holding any of the other 3 this way after they turned one or entered toddlerhood. But I will never forget looking down at my sweet, brown-faced cherub nestled against my chest, an almost 2 yr. old and in that one moment, sensing that God had somehow restored the 10mos. of Sarah's life we had lost. Because in that moment, she was that newborn I never held, that infant I never snuggled, that baby I missed who now so naturally belonged in this mommy's arms."
"He restores my soul" Psalm 23:3