Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Restorer of my soul

What do we think of each other??

Still asking that question... 9 mos. later : )

One of the biggest blessings of these unnatural "twins" is
how they make each other giggle!!

I just recently noticed that I always put Sarah on the left and Emily on the right whether it's the high chairs, carseats or cribs... crazy but I'm told by mommies of "twins" this is normal.

Mothering Moments in Adoption:
Been trying to to keep up with my mother's "paychecks" and had a good one to share about SARAH!

"Often times we take for granted special things or special moments because they are familiar and natural. For instance, the way I've always held my babies to comfort them. We're talking hours and hours over the last 8 yrs. spent standing and bouncing with my babies cradled inward, tummy to tummy, their tiny heads resting in the crook of my arm against my chest and their legs straddling my other arm.

When Sarah came home, she didn't want to be cradled, it made her scream. She only allowed us to hold her up on our shoulders or sitting in our laps facing outward. A few months home, she allowed me to sit with her on my lap and rock her.... it was like heaven!

Today, Sarah woke too early from her nap and I thought, "oh, if only I could get her back to sleep!" Without really processing what I was doing, I took her in my arms and cradled her just like my other three and started gently bouncing. She just looked up at me so peacefully and her eyes slowly closed. There was no screaming, no fighting... just a daughter resting in her mother's arms.

The strange part is I don't remember ever holding any of the other 3 this way after they turned one or entered toddlerhood. But I will never forget looking down at my sweet, brown-faced cherub nestled against my chest, an almost 2 yr. old and in that one moment, sensing that God had somehow restored the 10mos. of Sarah's life we had lost. Because in that moment, she was that newborn I never held, that infant I never snuggled, that baby I missed who now so naturally belonged in this mommy's arms."

"He restores my soul" Psalm 23:3


Mission Firefly said...

What a beautiful way to describe those moments with Sarah! That is exactly how I feel. Sophie still wants to be rocked to sleep everyday and I really treasure those moments.

Tony and Heather Snyder said...

You are such an amazing mother Marianna! Thank you so much for your openness. I love Sarah's looks! She is such a cutie.

Sara said...

Beautiful description of something I too have recently treasured. I think I all too often took those moments for granted with my bio kids, but realize how special it now that Kate loves it.

Carrie said...

Love the "paycheck" for Sarah...so sweet :) On another note, I must be the exception for moms of twins - my kids are always in different high chairs/car seats etc :) Everyone else I know w/ twins does the same thing as you. I'm just disorganized I think!

Amy said...

Beautiful words. I am so thankful to the Lord for allowing each of us moments like these.

By the way, did you get a new email address? I tried to email you and it bounced back. If it's new could you send me the new one. levisix@verizon.net